What if…?

They say that major life events will change you. Well, recent events got me thinking,

What if one day, I become a victim of terrorist attack? Or my family got caught in the event that transpired that day?

One thing for sure, I can’t imagine the grief that I’ll be going through or the fear that will haunt me. But I’m not sure what will happen after that. 

I might be consumed with fear and grief, so much that my life will be ruined from that day on. Or perhaps the event will motivate me to do better, to prepare for anything that might happen in the future.

I might be the same person as I was before. There is a possibility that any kind of major events won’t change the way I do things, that I will be the same no matter what happens. That’s not good though. That means I’m already content with my life. That I don’t really need anything, want anything, or afraid of anything. That my friend, is a bad combination of arrogance, indifference and laziness. And that’s bad. Really bad.

Why? Because I haven’t achieve anything major in life. Major enough for people to remember me long after I’m gone. Major enough to still give benefits for people even after I’m long gone. I want to make sure of that before my final moment comes. I want my life to have a meaning, that my world is a bit better because of me. That’s why I need to keep improving. IF a major life events can’t change me, then that means I’m stuck in current mental state. Inanimate with no progression to a better state.

And because of that, I’m afraid to die. I’m not ready for that. Not now. 

There’s still much to do.

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What if…?

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